May 9, 2023

What’s Your Dementia Caregiving Style? Find Out to Help Relieve Stress

About Katie Neal

Content Manager

Katie Neal is a former Parade magazine editor who was lucky enough to interview two of her idols — Jimmy Carter and Taylor Swift —before pivoting to a career in marketing. Now she leads content strategy and engagement for Brookdale Senior Living.

More than 11 million Americans serve as informal caregivers for a person living with dementia. The behavioral and psychological symptoms of dementia can be stressful to the people trying to manage their loved one’s care. As a caregiver, you recognize the challenges they face.

What you might not realize is that the way care is provided can also have an impact on how you feel. Caring for a person living with dementia can take an emotional and physical toll on you. Understanding your caregiving style can help you better grasp what to expect and how to prepare.

Amanda N. Leggett, PhD, FGSA, an assistant professor at the Institute of Gerontology and Department of Psychology at Wayne State University, has studied caregiving styles among a large group of family caregivers, identifying the five most common support styles. As part of Brookdale’s Optimum Life® Continuing Education series, she discussed how her research has determined five different caregiving styles.

Each caregiving style responds to care challenges differently, varies from person to person, and can even change depending on the situation, Dr. Leggett says. Ultimately, it’s important to know there is no “best” care style. Each style has its own strengths as well as areas for potential growth. Determining your style can help you approach caregiving in a way that can be more helpful and less stressful for you and your loved one. By understanding the various ways caregivers manage people living with dementia, we can look for strategies to help keep everyone healthier, both physically and mentally.

Which of the Five Styles of Caregiving Best Describes You?

Externalizers

You’re more sensitive to dementia’s impact on you. You get frustrated when you try to meet the needs of a person living with dementia and they’re exhibiting difficult behaviors. You’re good at expressing the challenges you are facing.

Strategies:

Know that you’re not alone. Other caregivers face similar challenges and can help support you.
Acknowledge that a disease process is taking place for your loved one, and they are not behaving this way to anger you.
Consider using respite care for a needed break.
Do some advanced planning to help alleviate stress in the moment.

Individualists

You’re observant and tend to provide care by “going it alone.” You’re usually effective at accomplishing goals, and you keep great records of symptoms and behaviors.

Strategies:

Don’t “miss the forest for the trees.” Try to consider the humanity of a situation and personhood of the person living with dementia, and not just the tasks to be accomplished.
Try not to take on all the responsibilities yourself. Work to share some tasks, or consider using an outside service for certain duties.

Learners

You recognize the need to continually grow in your understanding and approach to dementia, but you can sometimes get stuck. You accept help and try new ways of managing care.

Strategies:

Remember that trial and error is part of the learning process.
Guilt and empathy are common emotions experienced by Learners. Talking to a professional or a counselor may be helpful.

Nurturers

You show empathy and focus on your loved one’s remaining capabilities. You are proud of how you have grown in your care role.

Strategies:

Don’t forget to practice self-care.
Take planned breaks to help provide respite for yourself.

Adapters

You understand dementia, adjust well to challenges, and have acquired a collection of behavioral and management approaches.

Strategies:

Don’t miss the joyful moments in care. Look for growth and positive interactions.
Remember that it’s OK to express emotion — and humor is helpful medicine.
Acknowledge that you’re doing a good job.